For much of my life, I’ve been called a “truth-teller” — sometimes by choice, often by necessity (for better or worse). I have always been drawn to what lives beneath the surface: the real stories, honest emotions, painful patterns, and brave questions that shape who we are. That same instinct guided me through my earlier careers, where I listened to some of the hardest stories people can tell. Ultimately, it’s what led me to psychotherapy: a profession that allows me to sit with people in their truth, and help them find their way back to themselves.
I believe deeply that healing begins with honesty — honesty with ourselves, with our histories, with our relationships, and with the parts of us we’ve been taught to hide. My work is about helping clients uncover that truth gently, courageously, and with compassion.
My Approach: Honest, Warm, Grounded, and Deep
People often come to therapy feeling overwhelmed, anxious, burnt out, confused, grieving, stuck in relationship patterns, or unsure of who they are anymore. I don’t offer quick fixes or surface-level strategies. Real change happens when we go deeper — to the root causes of distress, the stories we’ve inherited, and the beliefs and behaviours that no longer serve us.
I offer therapy that is:
• Down-to-earth and warm
• Authentic, direct, and honest
• Compassionate, sensitive, and grounded
• Curious, intelligent, and insight-driven
• Courageous, spunky and animated at times, and unafraid of the hard work
My goal is to help clients feel understood, supported, and empowered — not just to cope, but to transform.
Professional Background
I am a Masters-level trained psychotherapist and counsellor, with graduate training from the University of Toronto’s Counselling Psychology program. With more than a decade of post-secondary education including several years of research into how thoughts, emotions, and behaviours interact under stress, I bring both breadth and depth to my clinical work.
I am a member of the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO) and the Ontario Association of Mental Health Professionals (OAMHP). I am also trained to provide clinical supervision to other therapists.
My work includes trauma-informed approaches, EMDR and IFS elements, mindfulness-based therapy, and relational and emotionally focused ways of understanding human experience.
A Career Built on Listening to Hard Stories
Before becoming a psychotherapist, I worked in professions that demanded resilience, strength, and an ability to sit with emotional intensity. Those years shaped me into someone who is not afraid of truth — or of the pain, grief, uncertainty, and complexity that often comes with it.
This history uniquely positions me to support clients who are dealing with:
• Anxiety, burnout, and chronic stress
• Grief, loss, and life transitions
• Trauma and old wounds resurfacing
• Relationship struggles and couples conflict
• Identity shifts, purpose, and meaning
• The emotional realities of blended or multigenerational families, and parenting more broadly
I show up with presence, clarity, warmth, sincerity, humour at times, and a willingness to roll up my sleeves and do the work with you.
Mindfulness, Ceremony, and Life Transitions
In addition to psychotherapy, I am a licensed Officiant and longtime meditation practitioner. I’ve supported individuals, couples, and families through major transitions — marriage, separation, new parenthood, death, and rites of passage — using ceremony, ritual, and grounded presence.
My integrated approach to therapy (in terms of modalities), combined with showing up as my authentic self, really guide my approach to therapy. I work to help clients cultivate clarity, compassion, awareness, and emotional resilience. I agree with the basic premise from Emotionally Focused Family Therapy that suggests that most of us are not acting with malicious intent. We are merely unskilled and misguided. Furthermore, I believe that traumatic experiences from our pasts can hijack the very best of intentions.
My Lived Experience: What Shapes How I Show Up
I’ve been married for over 20 years and am both a parent and a step-parent to adult children I’ve known since their adolescence. Like many families, mine is beautifully complicated. Blended families, multigenerational living, and various forms of loss — both concrete and ambiguous — have been part of my life. These experiences deepen my empathy and allow me to support clients navigating similar terrain with sensitivity and insight.
I bring a blend of:
• Professional expertise
• Personal experience
• Emotional depth
• Fierce compassion
• A sense of humour
• And a commitment to truth
I’ve learned that when we face the truth — gently, bravely, and with support — we open the door to real change.
Why Clients Work With Me
Clients often choose to work with me because they are looking for a therapist who is:
• Authentic and real
• Warm but not soft-peddling
• Straightforward yet deeply compassionate (but also able to laugh sometimes)
• Smart, thoughtful, intuitive, present, truly curious
• Unafraid of the hard stuff
• Able to hold depth, nuance, and complexity
• Able to help them find their voice
I help people reconnect with who they truly are, not who they’ve been taught to be.
Let’s Connect
If you’re ready to begin therapy — or just curious — I offer a free, initial consultation.
Email: cortney@ontariotherapist.com
Contact me now for a free, initial consultation. Additional profile information on Psychology Today. Email is the best way to reach me at: cortney@ontariotherapist.com (remember there is no “u” in Cortney). I don’t tend to answer phone calls. For existing client, you can book here: https://cortney-pasternak-counselling-and-psychotherapy.ca1.cliniko.com/bookings
Conveniently located office:
Hamilton, ON L8P 2E6
Free parking in the back of office. The entrance is in the front. The waiting area is through the front door and to your right.
